Another two-legged story I couldn't resist

Why Men are Rarely Published in Dear Abby

Dear Abby,

I've never written to you before, but I really need your advice on what could be a crucial decision. I've suspected for some time now that my wife has been cheating on me.

The usual signs... Phone rings but if I answer, the caller hangs up.
My wife has been going out with the girls a lot recently although when I ask their names she always says, "Just some friends from work, you don't know them."

I always stay awake to look out for her taxi coming home, but she always walks down the drive. Although I can hear a car driving off, as if she has gotten out of the car round the corner. Why? Maybe she wasn't in a taxi?

I once picked her cell phone up just to see what time it was and she went berserk and screamed that I should never touch her phone again and why was I checking up on her.

Anyway, I have never approached the subject with my wife. I think deep down I just didn't want to know the truth, but last night she went out again and I decided to really check on her.

I decided I was going to park my Harley Davidson motorcycle next to the garage and then hide behind it so I could get a good view of the whole street when she came home. It was at that moment, crouching behind my Harley, that I noticed that the valve covers on my engine seemed to be leaking a little oil.

Is this something I can fix myself or should I take it back to the
dealer?

Teaching to the math test

As Janet noted in her (second) comment to my last post, I have not updated this blog in some time. I'd like to pretend that some valid reason exists for that, but the truth is that I was trying to avoid that meme that was going around the edu-blogo-sphere about blogs that make you think. Early in my time here, I accidentally said some things that may (MAY - I'm not entirely certain, but those words MAY) have encouraged lucid thought, maybe even cogent thought. I apologize.

But now that the coast is clear, I can return to telling tales out of school.

This town I live in is small by most people's standards - gaining on 15 thousand people. To me, that's pretty damned big, as I grew up right around three highway corners from Grogan, Minnesota. Grogan has more cats than people, and only seventeen cats. There is no Pizza Hut in Grogan. No PetSmart, either.


Anyway....

As big as this town is, the back streets don't go on forever. Instead, they lead to the open road, to the lure of new worlds to explore. So I clambered into the truck with Alpha the other day, and we followed that lure east. I know that Lenny's Bar-and-Grill-and-SwapMeet is north, so I paid attention. No Pizza Hut. No PetSmart. Just a Dodge:













I was delighted to finally know the answer.